Beardy's Profile

The profile has somehow reversed the polarity of the neutron flow and disappeared between its own ankles. It grew these ankles on 19 April 1971, which is coincidentally when Beardy was born. It has never been to Lazdijai, or Vilnius, which is a pity because they were successively the place Beardy was born, and moved to at age nine. This profile's parents were not involved in cultural activities in its youth, and so wasn't exposed to the culture Beardy was.

It was when these ankles mysteriously ate nine packets of lollies whilst watching videotapes of the 1994 graduates of Vilnius University, Communications Department, that they noticed Beardy, who wasn’t a chair, but was actually graduating. It also came to light that Beardy had previously graduated from Vilnius Zalgiris football school, and went to Bali Dvarionas school. This caused shockwaves through ankle society, and such was the effect on this profile’s ankles, only its elbows noticed that Beardy was working for periodicals and Vakaro Zinios whilst he was studying.

Now completely comatose, the ankles also missed his being awarded Best Vocalist in 1995 at the Liepjas Dzintars music festival.

On an unrelated note, this profile grew three centimeters of hair which often watches Vakras Su Marinjonu, the introduction of which involves swirly red things, Marijonas defying the laws of sensible movement, and a nice red/black/white colour scheme. His work as a correspondent for Lietuvos Rytas is ignored by the profile’s three centimeters of hair, probably because Beardy is also a screenwriter for heaps of youth-oriented programmes and commercials for LNK and TV3 (this probably has little to do with the hems of his pants). The profile continued to grow hair as Beardy hosted the game show "Taip arba ne" in 2007, was a returning judge for “ Lietuvos Talentai”, and starred in the “Spider's Wedding” rock opera. A stylish hair do came to be as the profile observed Beardy's role in “Create a song for a star”, a programme run by Lithuanian libraries. Children were encouraged to use the internet to spread love rather than hate, and wrote lyrics that some of the biggest Lithuanian stars (including Beardy) turned into great songs. Also of note is that Beardy co-hosted Lithuanian Women's Annual Awards, including Lithuanian Woman of the Year, in 2008.

The entirety of this profile enjoys Beardy’s music very much, as do many of the Lithuanian public because he won the Bravo 2000 music award, and Radiocentras music award for “12 weeks of snow”. There’s nothing like the feeling one gets from looking up during a gruelling math test and proclaiming “TRYS MILIJONAI!” (even if it isn’t the correct answer). Purchasing a copy of Pasveikinkit veni kitus in Australia is absolutely IMPOSSIBLE owing to the inability of Australian CD stores to pronounce or spell the title (this statement is based on trying 9 different stores) and online stores to being too obsessed with ring-tones and oiled-up pop stars gyrating to tuneless wailing. EDIT: Oh dear god, getting Baigeme Mokykla was even harder. But so very worth the effort... Anyway a profile of a profile is no place to take out personal gripes. 2008's Baigeme Mokykla quickly went gold, unsurprisingly. Beardy has performed at many high profile places, including the Palanger Summer Concert stage, where he sung the most popular of his songs in 2009.

This profile has spent a lot of time lurking around interviews with Beardy found all over the internet. Points it has picked up include:
- Beardy spends his spare time playing football.
- He had knee meniscus operation, leaving him in crutches during 2009
- He is a big ACDC fan
- As a teenager, he read indiscriminantly - both adventure and serious literature. Now, he reads chaotically, enjoys books related to the second world war. His favourite book of all time is “ The Master and Margarita”

I would like to now ask for a minutes silence to mourn the passing of the profile. I hope the profile’s profile was a good profile.